it ain't easy being Green(ie)

Sunday, October 29, 2006

The Future, The Future, Always the Future!

So there are many things that i have learned in the past few days: i want to go to grad school, i need a new challenge. and I'm not sure if I'm going to move with Caitlin(as much as i want to.). i need to start living on my own and not let my self wait on the actions of others before i make my next steps in life. as much as I'm happy about where i landed on this last bit of life i know i need to have something more closely resembling a plan. and the only thing I've actually wanted to do for the last 23 years of my life is write so i think that i MUST apply to grad school, and figure out how to work out my life from there. of course i could completely change my mind by the time i wake up tomorrow and decide that this is the worst idea I've ever had. that remains to be seen.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Topical Timely and Relevent

So, if you haven’t heard some stuff went down at the Grey's Anatomy set. Now I’m not going to go into the main drama here. Feel free to read it just about anywhere on line that deals in news or celebrity gossip (or those places that think that celebrity gossip is real news) what I want to talk about is the resultant drama of Mr. T.R. Knight and his some what forced exit from the closet.

First I want to say thank you. I wish more people in the public eye would come out and provide role models and give us visibility. And especially as Mr. Knight is not a fashion designer or a techno musician or "Diva" as much as I appreciate those people in the world, (I watched the first season of Queer Eye religiously (but I was also trapped on my college campus without much else to do)) what I really want is for more people who don't fit the stereotype to come out, especially in the world of TV/Movies/Music. I’m tired of people coming out who everyone either assumed or knew was and was bound to some kind of non-disclosure contract, that doesn't have any kind of social impact or broaden the horizons of the definition of a gay man. This is why when Lance Bass came out I was neither impressed nor particularly surprised. First of all just about everyone assumed that at least one of the many, many boy-band members were gay. So Lance's revelation was more like a foregone conclusion. "Oh wow one of the 'golden voiced' and 'clean cut' pop band boys just came out! Alert the presses!! Someone needs to get this boy on the cover of a magazine so that every one can hear his surprising and uplifting story" Bullshit. Other then the fact that no one other then a few very naive and inattentive people were surprised isn’t the only problem with this. He also wasn't the first. There were at least two British boy-band stars that came out before he did. And they were added to the increasingly long list of openly gay British musicians (granted most of them make nearly the same kind of music) proving that we in America have a long way to go before we really can consider ourselves tolerant of homosexuality.

My other problem with Lance's coming out was that it happened nearly 5 years after his groups last album. At this point coming out will not affect his career, he doesn’t have a career anymore. Making this a completely risk less situation (not to mention that he was basically forced out of the closet by his boyfriend and on of the many gay bloggers). He is at a point now where reveling his sexuality will not matter to him, his record label, his fans, or really anyone. Making it doubly pointless, no one was surprised and no one cared. We need more people to come out in the middle of their careers, like Mr. Knight. And perhaps he didn't really want to do it and was some what forced out by the recent controversy over his show but at the very least he owned up to it. And I especially like the way he worded it "While I prefer to keep my personal life private, I hope the fact that I'm gay isn't the most interesting part of me." now he falls back on the "personal life" thing that I don't really like (yes I realize that it is your life and you don't want to go blabbering about your entire sexual history to everyone with a pulse but this question is both simple and important. all you have to say is "yes I prefer dudes" or "I wouldn't be apposed to dating a man" or "no but I appreciate your curiosity" and you could do a lot of good) anyway. Back to what I did like about it, I like that he said that he hoped it wasn't the most interesting thing about him. And that is very important, as for most of the people who are openly gay in American celebrity culture their sexual orientation is the most interesting thing about them. All of the people they parade on TV to show us that they respect us. Most of them are shallow stereotypes playing their sexuality for a laugh (there are however some great gay comedians out there so don’t think that I hate funny gay people). I’m glad to see that some one is being honest about who he is and I hope that it doesn’t effect his career negatively (I highly doubt it as he is on one of TVs most successful shows) and this will prompt more people to actually take a risk with their coming out. We need more variety in the gay celebrity community, we don’t need any more pop artists, hairdressers, fashion designers, or gay vague leading men. We need admittedly gay people who show that there is more to us then just good taste and the ability to accessorize.

PS this would have been more topical timely and relevent if i had finished it when i started it two days ago

Monday, October 02, 2006

Fresh off the Perverbial Presses

so i intended to start this long ago. about when i read White Teeth.
i have started a book review blog.
partly to show off my impressive book related snobary and partly so that i might have something to show if i want to try to get a frelance job reviewing things

either way the first review is up
for David Foster Wallace's Infinit Jest


Sunday, October 01, 2006

Re: Banjo Player

so who is this Banjo person and why was i so unhappy about him

just the most recent in a long line of people i've fallen for and then discovered were not intrested in me. and more proof that i seem to be incapable of falling for men who even like my gender.

this perticular agent of emotional abuse is the atractive young gentalman who plays the Banjo at Buttermilk's monthly Johnny Cash/Hank Williams night (though this particular evining he was sans banjo). this particular month Me and Jaimie had decided that we were going to perform at the hodown, chosing to sing I Got Stripes. and we did a rather bang up job. not the best rendition of the song but dam good for two amatures who rarly ever sing at microphones. now my particular desire to be involved in this was to use it as an opertunity to hit on said Banjo Player. whom i had compleatly failed to talk to when i saw him at the Brooklyn Country Music Festival a few weeks ago. (the failure was not compleatly my fault as he was working the soundboard and thus unable to be approched for most of the night). unfortunatly the most of the Banjo Player i saw post Jaimie and My performace was him in a distant corner of the bar flirting rather heavaly with some chick, an oppinion that was coroborated by Arusha when she did some reconosince for me.

hence the angry post from that evining.

my problem is that i wish to be more relationshiply active without having to compromise my self. but i keep finding that the only people that i have to chose from to have a relationship with are the kind of people i would rather poke in the eye with a sharp stick and all the people i would like to poke elsewhere are only intrestind in pokeing ladies.
i'm not looking for Mr. Right i'm looking for Mr. Tollorable
but it would appear that i am the most homophobic person i know


ps: sory for the prolonged poke metaphore but it just semed to work.